south end economic stimulus package (not a viagara ad)

CAMANO SENIOR AND COMMUNITY CENTER
SPAGHETTI ECONOMIC STIMULUS PACKAGE

 As most of you South End fiscally alert socialites well know, the Band was scheduled to play a benefit for the Camano Senile Center’s SIPS AND SUDS spring fundraiser this coming Sat. March 7th.  They were bringing in adult beverages for your sampling pleasure in hopes bibulous fun might mitigate your economic anxieties …. a proven remedy for the South End String Band.  Even in prosperous times…

    And the Band, ever eager to please, had been hard at work getting ready for this concert.  We’d worked on synchronized sipping until our wrists ached.  But I have to confess, we never really got very good at it.  Sipping just isn’t the Band’s style.  Guzzling, slurping, gulping, chugging, glugging, now THAT we got down.

     In the end we realized it just wasn’t going to work.  Sipping…..come on!  These are Tough Economic Times and they call for decisive action.  Sipping’s just a bit underwhelming when bold strokes are called for.   So the Camano Senior and Community Center decided to take a proactive path toward economic recovery.  Their stimulus package, conceived in the foggy weeks of this bleary, dreary winter, brings a ray of hope to the seasonally and fiscally afflicted.  In the recesses of its low wattage inner sanctum boardroom, the Center determined to act courageously, knowing half hearted measures would likely prove ineffective.  Difficult times call for decisive action.  Difficult times demand visionary thinking.  Difficult times require unified teamwork   They decided it was whole hog or no hog.

     In the end they approved an economic recovery package that may well prove to be a model for a national stimulus program.  If your 401-K has sunk lower than my Chevy on its rusted rims, if your credit cards are growing fangs, if your once friendly hometown bank is pestering you about that missed mortgage payment, you definitely will want to consider the Spaghetti Feed Stimulus Package the Center is offering on March 7th.  They’ll be operating the breadline from 4-7 and they’ll most definitely be serving adult beverages.    

    And if the promise of vino and brews gulped, not sipped, isn’t enough to lift your spirits, the South End String Band will lift those spirits FOR you, both literally and metaphorically.  Our intrepid band of fiduciary refugees who make their home in the fog-shrouded nettle regions of Camano’s backwashed southern climes, have been preparing most of our lives for the opportunity to pass on our South End fiscal wisdom, according to Skeeter Daddle, the Band’s investment guru.  If anyone can show you the path to Enlightenment Thru Unemployment, us folks can.  Don’t wait for the PBS series when you can fill your bellies and quench those nagging fiscal questions in one easy seminar.  Misery loves company so come on down!  We’ll all take turns on the pity potty.

     Mark your calendars.  Saturday, March 7th, 2009:  The Day We Fired Our Investment Counselor and Learned How To Maximize Poverty For Fun and Pleasure.     The good times are here again!

   SPAGHETTI FEED STIMULUS PACKAGE   4- 7 PM.  $10.50 for members and $12 for us huddled masses at the door. 
www.southendstringband.com

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